Where do we stand?

What is love?
I think I will never be able to answer that question.
Sometimes all I want to do is break down and cry all my tears of anguish, pain, stress and loneliness away.
When I see two hands interlocked, sweet kisses and gentle caresses..my heart flutters with the thought of maybe one day feeling that same love they do.
My mind goes to the thought of you and how I wish and how I dream..and how it hurts.
Where do we stand?
I don't think I will ever know the real answer. Being in the dark, and trying to come up with answers to questions unknown is the hardest and scariest part.
If only you could be honest with me and tell me what you really feel, it would save me all the time in the world, when my mind wanders off trying to piece the puzzles together..
You told me that emotions can't help but be involved, yet from the beginning, you told me to be careful about the feelings I have for you and that you stay emotionally distant.
Yet here we are in this situation, where you are telling me that I flirt with others guys, and I'm interested in other guys and that it is disrespectful and you get jealous.
How is that being emotionally distant?
In this moment, all I can think about is the first time you told me you wanted this relationship with me, not the kind in the romantic movies, but the other kind where we are just intimate friends with no such thing as love ever developing between us.
When am I going to sleep peacefully tonight?
I'm so tired of how this makes me feel and how hard I have to fight to understand what is going on between us. It will never end until one of us says stop. I don't know if I can be the one to do it.
You tell me that now you are no sure where we stand.
Well I will tell you this..
If you can't love me, if you can't tell me you love me, if you can't show me that you love me,
then we don't stand, not together, not with each other..
You stand alone on frozen solid ground.

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